Futility

Once again I have no idea what to write. I have a vague idea forming. It touches the edge of my consciousness and before I can grab it and hold it tight, it fades away. It then creeps back at the very moment that I cannot grab a pen and a piece of paper and write it down. Perhaps it will fully reveal itself this weekend. Or perhaps it won't.

When I first thought about starting a second blog, I had rather grandiose ideas about what I would write and how I would write it. So far, things aren't working out as I imagined. But isn't that ever the case? You start down one path and then something distracts you and before you know it, you aren't anywhere near where you'd thought you'd be. One would hope that where you ended up is somehow better than where you were headed. But maybe it isn't. But wherever you end up, it's where you need to be. Maybe you are helping someone, maybe someone is helping you, maybe you are being handed a life lesson.

My friend was disappointed with his half marathon time, because he knew he could do better. And yes, that's probably true. He could do better and probably will. But on that day, he ran the race he ran. No more and no less. It's not bad and it's not good. It just is.

So this blog just is. And one day, as that idea touches the edge of my consciousness, I'll take it by surprise and seize it. If it will let me.